Galicia Gordon on Leading Learners Blog

Feb 10, 2022

Why You Should Be Positive, Even When The Other Person Is Not

Growing up, I heard some of the worst kinds of backlash stories with my parents being in high-demand and customer/patient-facing industries. There was never a single week that went by where I would not hear a comment about patients, customers, clients, or people complaining, justifying, pushing, or forcing negativity out into the world. For no reason at all.

I always found it, not amazing, but surprising, baffling even, how some people could come to meet someone who only has their best interest at heart, wants them to succeed even more than themselves, and is eagerly pushing for their wellbeing, could be negative. I spent almost two decades of my life saying "why?"

I have been spending a great deal of time alone, and the past 4 months I have been in isolation. Intentionally? At 18 years old? As in literally only leaving the house for food? Yes. I told my friends I did not want to have any video calls, nor not a single push to hang out, because I wanted to be introspective. And learn more about people.

I found that I have changed drastically in terms of tolerance and my overall mood. I now could hear the worst kinds of backlash, and I would not bat an eye. In short, nothing and nobody can affect me emotionally or psychologically.

Let me give you an example. What if someone near and dear to you, came up to you on the street, and began calling you every insult in the book and said that any of your goals are not going to go anywhere? How would you react? What would you do? Would you be defensive? For myself, I would pause, let them finish everything they have to say, give no reaction, and keep walking.

The only way someone would be negative for no reason is internal. It is true. I used to find it confusing too, when some of these inspirational gurus would say "be positive to these negative people," "don't take it personally," or "hurt people hurt people."

Let me give you another example. What if you had someone who only has your best interest at heart, wants you to succeed even more than themselves, and is eagerly pushing for your wellbeing? There are only two types of people: the people who cherish, and do not. But fear not, I know the majority of people are probably thinking: I was like that, they took advantage of me, and left like nothing, Galicia. Do not be trying to comfort me right now.

But I want to put this into perspective for you. Imagine you are a diamond, money, or whatever you deem valuable. What is that to you? It is beneficial, only has your best interest at heart, and would only help you and every single person you offered it to. If you offered that to someone, and they say "no," "it's not good enough," "I do not want that near me," or the like, you should never, ever, without a single doubt, no matter what, even if the worst situation, think that it is no longer valuable. It always will be.

When you have someone call you a bad name, take advantage of you, or not want you to be happy, please, please know that, nobody on this entire Earth. Nobody. None. At all. Nobody is born thinking "I should harm and damage someone." Nobody on this entire Earth.

It is learnt. No if, but, or maybe. Anyone can argue me, but again, I would pause, let them finish everything they have to say, give no reaction, and keep walking.This is why I am never negative, I am never jealous, I am never insecure, and I never get angry. And yes, I have faced psychological experiences that did make me not trust many people more than anyone on this Earth I have met. It is why I follow only people I have learnt to trust, stay more private than anyone I know, and never reveal any accomplishments.

An amazing YouTube channel named "ReFind You" described it like this: first an emotion, then a mood, then a personality trait. Nobody, again, nobody, on this entire Earth is born thinking "I should harm and damage someone, make them lose themselves, and see them fall and cry." Nobody. It is sick to say, but it is formed. First, an emotionally heightening experience happens in that person's life, then they carry out a general mood about people or people like yourself, and develop a personality trait. A personality trait can be thinking the worst of things, name-calling, avoiding people, always waiting for someone else to reach out first, or stonewalling. None of these are good.

I know in business, regarding trust, it is worse. Once again, I am young, and the company I am building is going far, but we have already had two people try to acquire us like I would genuinely let that happen.

Please understand, nobody is born negative or wanting to see someone fail. Not a single person on this entire Earth.

I made a quick episode on my podcast titled "How I Am Never Jealous, Angry, Negative, Insecure, Rude, Worried, Envious, Mean, Or Negative (10 Minutes On How I Am Never These Emotions) ⏤ Capulus Podcast." It may help too, check it out.

Have a great one! Cheers!